taking my dog for a walk is actually one of my dreams. the kind of dream people’ll only have when there can be strictly no pet in their homes. 

(Source: photoperspective)

Every time I walked with my friends, they would usually lag behind and whine, “Dude, what’s the hurry?” Then I would realise that I indeed walked too fast for a lazy saturday night out. Embarrassed, I would joke my way out of it and start to slow down. I don’t know since when I started to walk faster than usual, even when I am not in a hurry or anything I would walk like I am actually chasing someone. I always think I have so little time in my hands, time is critical, I gotta hurry. Have you ever feel like that? Thinking about stuff that make you uneasy and stay late at night? Locking yourself indefinitely in your room doing stuff that creates distance between you and your family? You read and read and read and learn and learn and just keep learning and just to find out you’ll never get enough? And yet of all the time you spent, you still feel shitty thinking you don’t have enough time for yourself, to relax? We move faster and faster as if there is this big monster chasing us and we are so afraid we have no choice but to keep running. What does this monster want from us? we don’t know. What we know is, we all have this big aspiration for something. We know we haven’t done enough, we know our capabilities are better than what we have and we are dying to give the world all we got. It is bloody tiring, I know. And I am too, not sure when I can actually relax and enjoy life.

Maybe I was starting to walk faster than usual when I got this aspiration. I don’t know when, but it just materialised out of nothing inside me. Then a monster was born from that aspiration and started chasing. I don’t know whether I will make it, escape the monster and live a happy ending. But for all I know, that monster is not our enemy. It is just there to keep us running, to our dreams. Until then, he will just keep chasing and chasing.